We Can't Go Back
by whitephoenix18
Summary: "There is no going back" It had been two weeks since that moment when Sasuke's world came crashing down. Rated for strong language. Sasunaru, SasuxNaru


**_So this is my first SasuNaru fanfiction. I thought I might give it a try and see how it went. I hope you enjoy it!_**

* * *

 _"It is to look ahead and prepare, than to look back and regret." -Jackie Joyner-Kersee_

 _"What could Kiba have possibly learned about you that would send him that far?" Sasuke tried to make a joke out of it but it didn't work. Naruto just pulled away._

 _"Let it go!" He hissed but Sasuke was just as stubborn as his friend._

 _"Dammit Naruto! What the hell? Just tell me!" Sasuke snapped._

 _"That I am gay, asshole. Happy!" Naruto retorted back. His words froze Sasuke. That was the last thing Sasuke ever expected to hear. Naruto watched as Sasuke processed what he said and deep down knew he couldn't stop there. "He was bitching about some guy at work that came out and-ugh, I don't know it just came out. He was talking shit and I couldn't stand it anymore. I figured it would freak the guys out but I didn't think Kiba would lose his shit like that." Naruto watched Sasuke, waiting for him to respond but he was still stuck in place. "For fuck sake Sasuke, say something?!" Naruto pleaded. He needed Sasuke to say something, anything._

 _"How long?" It was the best Sasuke could do at the moment._

 _"Since the spring before high school, when I dated Yuki." Naruto blurted. His words sinking into Sasuke only to set him exploding._

 _"So what? You date one girl and suddenly you like guys. Have you even been with a guy?!" Sasuke confusion only seemed to grow as the conversation continued. His head was spinning with all of this new information. They had known each other for so long, Sasuke couldn't just accept it. All those times they talk about girls, about their ideal type, and suddenly this? There were suddenly so many questions running through his head._

 _"Sasuke, it wasn't just after dating one girl. I-" Naruto paused, not knowing how to say it. "I wasn't sure so at first so I hooked up with a guy a couple of times. But it was more than that, okay? There was someone I like. Still like actually." His voice was barely auditable._

 _"Who?" The word left his lips before he could stop it and he wasn't sure he wanted to hear the answer. Naruto tried to back away but Sasuke latched on to him, forcing Naruto to face him. He wasn't just going to walk away from this._

 _"You." Naruto confessed. He knew Sasuke wouldn't have let it go until he told him anyway, but he still couldn't shake the icy fear the began to surge within him. But for Sasuke, his stomach plummeted to the floor beneath him. All the thoughts, all the questions just disappeared._

 _"You are kidding right? This is a joke." He chuckled, releasing him. They were best friends, there was no way that Naruto could like him like that. He was in shock. However, for Naruto though, Sasuke's blatant denial seemed to be the nail in the coffin for him._

 _Sasuke never saw it coming. Never saw how close Naruto had come until suddenly those lips were pressed firmly against his, and his world came crashing down._

* * *

"Sasuke. I am sorry." Naruto's voice pleaded with him. "I didn't tell you because I wanted us to get together or anything, okay? Hell, the only reason I even kissed you was to prove a point. Please, I just want my best friend back." His voice trembled.

"There is no going back anymore." Sasuke said as he continued to look out over the river.

It had been two weeks since that moment. Sasuke didn't know how to react or even how he felt afterwards. He needed space from Naruto but the more space he took, the more confused he became. Ever since that kiss, he began to question everything and finally it lead this moment with him leaning against the railing of a bridge wondering if he was making the right choice.

* * *

 _"Nice to have you back little brother." Itachi remarked. "Is everything okay? You seem…distracted lately." Itachi leaned forward, trying to catch Sasuke's gaze. However, before he could Sasuke grabbed his bowl and went into the kitchen. He emptied the what was left into the trash can and dropped the bowl into the sink. "Sasuke!" Itachi's stern voice followed just behind him._

 _"Everything is fine. Just drop it." Sasuke snapped. Itachi waited at the edge of the kitchen and watched as Sasuke fumed over their kitchen sink, his grip tightening on the ledge._

 _"No it isn't. You look like shit, which isn't a surprise with all of the early mornings. I know I joke about the 'early' showers but Sasuke, this is ridiculous, you need sleep. Furthermore, you have been avoiding talking about school for the past two weeks like it was a plague. Hell Sasuke, when was the last time Naruto was even over?" Itachi stopped himself, taking a deep breath. "Sasuke, I don't have to be a mind reader to know that something is off. Is it Naruto? Did something happen? Are you two fighting or something?"_

 _It was too much. Every word. Every question. It was like fuel to the storm eating away at him on the inside._

 _"Fuck, Itachi!" Sasuke whirled around to face his brother. "Just drop it." He barked at his brother. Stepping forward, Sasuke tried to leave but Itachi blocked him in._

 _"Talk to me." Itachi pleaded with his brother._

 _Sasuke clenched in his jaw in pain. The pain that had been eating at him for these past two weeks. He didn't know what to do. He felt like a tiger trapped in a cage. Everything inside him told him to lash out but he knew it was the one who would get hurt._

 _"Sasuke." Itachi murmured his name. Sasuke couldn't fight it. He was just too tired._

 _"Naruto is gay." Sasuke caved. Looking Itachi dead in the eye, he waited for his response._

 _"Is that it?" Itachi asked, slightly surprised. Sasuke stepped back, shocked by his brother's lack of reaction. Itachi could see his brother's confusion and continued. "I suspected but I was never really sure." Sasuke just stared at his brother stunned._

 _"Why didn't you say something?" He hissed. Itachi pondered for a second before answering._

 _"Does it really matter? So he likes men, doesn't change the fact that he is your best friend." Itachi replied coolly but his words hit Sasuke like a brick. Before he knew what he had done the words had already slipped out of his mouth._

 _"He kissed me."_

 _Itachi just stared at him, Sasuke's words slowly sinking in. He opened his mouth to speak but nothing came out. Itachi didn't know what to say and Sasuke could only watch as his brother processed it. The silence between them was like ants under Sasuke's skin. Creeping slowly up and around every part of him until he couldn't take it anymore._

 _"I liked it Itachi…..I…liked it."_

 _It was like a wave of relief flooded over him. To final say what crawled underneath his skin and haunted him in his dreams. It was like he could finally breath again._

 _Sasuke watched as Itachi processed his words, and he could see that he was trying to find the right words to say. However, Sasuke didn't expect his brother to say anything or maybe, he expected something even worse. Fear began to creep back in, his heart racing to keep up. Itachi coughed and Sasuke felt his heart stop for just a second._

 _"Okay." Itachi said in a matter of fact tone._

 _Sasuke couldn't believe his ears._

 _"Okay? I just told you that I liked kissing Naruto and all you can say is okay." Sasuke snapped. He felt like the world just turned upside down. He was expecting shock, confusion, hell maybe even anger but not the simple answer of okay._

 _"Sasuke, you are my brother. Granted that was a lot to take in but it doesn't change anything."_

 _"But I am not gay Itachi." Sasuke wanted to scream. He wanted a reaction to justify the confusion inside him. Itachi just looked at him. He waited for Sasuke to breath before he said a word._

 _"And I never said you were, but sometimes you just like someone regardless of their gender. Sasuke, I am not going to tell you that what you are feeling is wrong because there is nothing wrong with what you are feeling, and I would imagine that you are feeling quite a lot right now. But, no matter what little brother, you are still my brother and I will always love you regardless of the choices you make." Itachi spoke genuinely and calmly to Sasuke._

 _His words were like a flood gate and Sasuke couldn't feel as the tears began to fall down his face. The fear, the anxiety, and the confusion came crashing inside him. Immobilize by the unraveling storm, all Sasuke could do was stand as his brother wrapped his arms around him and pulled him in close._

* * *

The sun turned the river to gold as it sank into the horizon. Sasuke watched and thought about everything that has happened and now he believed he had his answer. He turned to face his long time friend who looked more like a lost puppy with his head slumped down than the bright trickster he had grown up knowing.

"Naruto." He called out. The blonde lifted his gaze to meet his and Sasuke nodded to the spot next to him against the bridge railing. Naruto cautiously stepped over to him and put his back against the warm metal. Neither one said anything at first. Silently, they listened as the cars passed and the wind whispered against the water. Sasuke took in the moment. He knew his answer.

"We can't go back." He said.

If time could stop, then it did for him. Even as he reached for him, time seemed to slow and Sasuke could see the reflection of how he once felt in Naruto's eyes. Even as their lips met and a fire was set ablaze in Sasuke, time seemed nonexistent. All that was real in that moment was the pressure against his lips, the heat against his skin, and hunger for more inside him.

He pulled away but only enough to lean his forehead against Naruto's. Looking into his eyes, he watched as confusion danced in Naruto's eyes.

"I…I-I…" Naruto stammered.

"Usuratonkachi." Sasuke murmured back. Then twisting just slightly, he claimed the feeling once again, savoring every moment in the final light of the summer sun.

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 **Thanks for reading!**


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